Friday, April 22, 2005


Hello, internet. I just got back from Kung Fu Hustle* and before I go to bed (for I am a tired man), I have to tell you that something is happening and I don't know what it is. Description follows.

There is a weird low-level ache in my chest residing right around my sternum. Every once in a while, equatorial bands of pain manifest themselves around my upper ribcage; these pain events seem to coincide with certain motions/changes of position (like sitting in the driver's seat of a car and rolling the window down). Just bending down makes them go, actually. Sometimes it's exhaling that does it.

This is extra-weird because if I sit and actually make with the full, slow inhale/exhale, lots of times I don't get the pain happening. But then again sometimes if I sit still long enough it appears. Its main locus is definitely around my sternum.

It doesn't feel like heartburn, which I gather is an actual burning sort of sensation (this isn't). I haven't been doing anything out of the ordinary, physically speaking, and as far as I know, I did not inject metal or ceramic shavings directly into my pectoral muscles. It began with weird back-centric pain around 3 or 4:00 this afternoon -- my back would zing me if I did certain things, made certain gestures. Now it's migrated to the front of me? What the hell is going on?

If I wake up tomorrow and this is still happening, I am seeking medical attention, because this is bullshit.

Good night, people! Or good morning, as the case may be.

* Which I recommend unreservedly.